and I just put my little munchkin to bed. Kyle’s working nights this week and I have to admit, it’s been pretty rough. He’s home during the day, but a lot of the day he is sleeping or getting ready for work again. My mom was with me the last few nights, which was so much fun for us and helped put some of my loneliness in the evenings at bay.
Madison is an amazing sleeper! Normally, for her naps or at night time, I just give her her blanket and her pacifier and put her right into bed and leave. She goes right to sleep.
Tonight, as I laid her down in her crib, she said “mommy? mommy?” and got this sad little look on her face. We had just finished singing a song and praying and now she was looking at me like she really needed me. I held on to her little hand while she said “mommy? mommy?” I really wanted a little alone time to clean our house, read, take a bath, etc. and Madi had been up since 12 p.m. so I knew she was tired. Her sweet little face got the best of me and so I told her “ok, one story.” I took her out of her crib and we cuddled up on the rocking chair with Goodnight Moon. We read it while Madi pointed out the socks every time she could see them. Then I decided to sing her a song. She cuddled up like she hasn’t in awhile and I started singing. After one song she said, “more?” I sang another and another. Every time I finished she asked for more. I sang until her sweet little eyelids got droopy and finally closed. Then I sang one more song, kissed her on her forehead, and tucked her into bed.
The reason I’m writing this is because I have this giant lump in my throat–the good kind. I am feeling this incredible love for my little girl. A lot of times, maybe even most of the time–if she said “mommy?” I would just say “goodnight, I love you” and leave. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. Sometimes kids have to go to bed and she probably would have been asleep about 30 seconds after I left the room. But! I am so happy that I didn’t do that tonight. I am so happy that I took this chance to have such a special moment with my baby.